I challenge you to find one mum out there, new or old, that doesn’t suffer from some kind of mum guilt, however big or small it may be. There’s just something in the title of becoming a mother that makes our brains switch and become instant worriers, and for those of us who worried pre-baby, it’s likely to have got a WHOLE lot worse!
Illustration by Catherine Morton
There’s lots I feel guilty about. Men don’t seem to get it. They don’t realise all of these crazy things that go on in a mother’s mind when they’re trying to keep a household paddling above water.
These are the things I tend to do the most which I feel most guilty about…
1 | Snapping at Chris because I’m overly tired and grumpy.
2 | Having to do all of the household chores when my baby just wants my attention.
3 | Scrolling through Instagram at 2am while feeding Archie when I should be giving him my full undivided attention
4 | Putting my make up on so that I feel slightly human.
5 | Crying when I can’t explain what’s wrong.
6 | Thinking about returning to work and leaving him with someone else.
7 | Wanting to feel like Sian again and not just a mam.
8 | Wanting to sit down with a cuppa but feeling like I should be doing something else.
But how do your rid your thoughts of this guilt? Well here are some of the things I’m trying to put into practice to make the days easier.
1 Reminding myself I’m not superwoman | Nor do I have to be. There’s no rulebook for motherhood. It’s a crazy roller coaster that no one is really sure how the journey will fair.
2 Stop comparing my life to others | One thing I am particularly guilty of is looking at other families and comparing my life to theirs. I always seem to see the perfect in theirs and the reality of mine, rather than noticing all of the good things about my own.
3 Focus on the good | Instead of being so negative all of the time, I’m trying to see the positive side of things.
Of course all of this will come in time. It’s not an overnight miracle, but I know I’ll get there. Just like those of you out there who are feeling similar to me when it comes to mum guilt. We will get through this x