Well this is it. Day one of the rest of our lives.
I’ve always known I wanted to be a mum. It’s the one thing in life that I hoped I would be good at, that and being a wife. There was something about the way I used to care for my doll when I was young. I don’t know if it was an only child thing but I would nurture her as if she were my own baby sister.
I was three days late for my period before I decided to take a test. I’ve heard of a mother’s intuition but I never expected to experience it first hand. I woke up on Sunday morning and just knew something was different. I had a test in the house, so I decided to take it. I rushed downstairs to our small toilet and took the test. I didn’t have to wait the recommended two minutes before seeing a cross appear in the display window. I quickly put it down and stepped away, put the timer on my phone and waited what felt like the longest two minutes of my life. I’d already seen the window turn to positive but I wanted to be doubly sure.
And sure enough, two minutes later there it was. A blue cross. Clear as day. Positive. I fell to the floor in pure elation and (granted I’m a very emotional person) began sobbing. I couldn’t contain my excitement but for some reason it was coming out in tears. I guess I was just so emotional about the fact it was real. I’m going to be a mum.
So right now baby bear is the size of a pumpkin seed. It’s hard to believe that something so small could have the ability to grow into a living, breathing baby. It’s an incredible feeling knowing that my body is currently making the perfect little home for our baby to make camp in for the next eight months.
I’ve had a pretty groggy first day if I’m totally honest. I’ve had a migraine for the past two days and nothing will budge it. Now that tablets are off the cards, I’ve resorted to Kool ‘n’ Sooth strips that used to help me no end when I used to get severe headaches at school. I also feel super tired. I didn’t know if that would even be a symptom this early on, but it turns out it is! Yey for me not being a totally crazy mum-to-be!
The toughest part of day one is the secrecy. You want to literally shout it from the rooftops. I couldn’t be happier right now, and yet the only person that can share this joy with me is my wonderful partner, who without him I wouldn’t (be pregnant obviously!) or be able to cope with all the crazy that’s about to happen. He’s my rock. (I also apologise to him in advance for the mood swings, excessive worrying and general pain in the bum I am most likely going to throw his way.
In amongst the emotion and after letting the news sink in, I made my first phone call to the midwife. I’m not going to lie I felt so scared phoning. I’m not particularly great when it comes to phone calls in the first place but there was just something about this phone call that made my heart pump a little faster. Was I going to be judged? Will they ask me loads of questions? Will I know the answers? In reality, they asked my name, D.O.B, and when my last period was. Pretty straightforward and thankfully I could answer all of those!
So now it’s a waiting game. The midwife will call me back to arrange my first scan. I am so beyond excited. It’s all so real now.
Love, a very happy mum-to-be x